The Last Throwback Post To My South Africa Holiday

I think I've more or less covered the stories I've wanted to share about my time in South Africa. A lot happened that I don't feel comfortable sharing on such a public place. Though there are a few things I do want to cover before I move on to another chapter of my life.

One of the things I was able to do whilst I was in South Africa was going to my parents' church. They were part of a new church plant in Hoespruit since I left the country three years ago (can't believe how fast time has gone). They felt that they were to co-plant this particular church with a couple God brought into Hoedspruit. I've heard a lot about the Gathering Place, as its called, and I'm glad I got the chance to be to go to a service (which are held in the evenings) there and to meet the couple who are leading the church.

The other thing I want to write briefly about is how grateful I am to have been able to spend some time with a good friend of mine, Rita. We met when I was helping out at the Hoedspruit Christian School. We kinda clicked and would go out for coffee regularly in the days when I lived in South Africa. We've been in communication ever since I left. I was fortunate enough to see her more than once during my visit. We'd end up talking for hours and never run out of things to talk about. Usually we'd end up running out time to talk about life. I'm so grateful for her and our friendship!

Moving Again Soon

Today is Monday, the last Monday of August. Its also my last Monday in Epe and my last Monday at Herdershof. The day of my departure for The Hague gets closer and closer. I leave in less than five days time... this Friday, actually. I'm going to spend the weekend in the room of someone from the church (whilst she's away)... but more on the plan for the next few weeks later on in this post. Its becoming much more real for me and in some areas its both exciting and scary. I'm excited about moving back to a bustling city and working with such a vibrant church, Redeemer International Church. On Saturday, I traveled over to Den Haag to see my host family. We wanted to meet up before I arrive, to get to know each other. My hosts are a young family with two kids are both under 4 years old who are both energetic and sweet. We spent hours over dinner getting to know each other. They've given me a bedroom in their attic (yes, 99% of all Dutch homes have attics that are used as either bedrooms, laundry rooms or office rooms) to use during the ten months of my internship with Redeemer. So I've got a place to stay for the duration of my time in Den Haag, which I'm happy about (one of the handy parts of where my hosts live is that it's really easy to get to the centre of Den Haag from my hosts' house by bus).

The plan is that I'm going to move to Den Haag this Friday to spend the first weekend in the apartment from someone I know from the church. Then on next week on Monday, 4 September, I'm flying to the UK for six days. This is for a training camp that's part of the internship I'm doing. I'm really looking forwards to being back in the UK, even for a short time.

Looking back over the last two weeks, since the GOTeams ended, I've spent a lot of my time over the last few weeks packing my stuff up. I've accumulated a lot of things over the last year and its been quite an ordeal going through everything deciding what needs getting rid of. I don't have a car or a driver's licence (that's a story I'm not going to go into now), so can't pack a car full of things. I've more or less succeeded in sorting out and packing.

I got stuff to do so I'd best be off. Until next time!

The Right To Speak

The roots of this post has been playing on my mind for a few weeks now. I've been rewriting the ideas I've been having on my iPhone from time to time and trying to bring some fluidity to the driving force that propelled me to write this.

Warning:: this post is NOT aimed to destroy your assumptions about certain persons, nations or cultures. This isn't a post where I'm purposefully making things up to prove a point. This post is totally based on truth and effect that the truths of others have had on me. This is a post where I'm writing my dealing with what a few individuals have said to me. These people aren't not all Dutch, so I'm not trying to pick a fight with them… I'm being honest here about a struggle I've been having, and I know I'm going to dip into a huge European taboo. If you read on, you do so at your own risk.

The words 'diet' and 'weight loss' are huge taboos in the western world, as is the subject of money and how much you earn (but this post isn't about money. I'm not going to break that taboo today). You just don't talk about dieting or weight loss, and if you do, you can expect to have some huge reputations. So by saying what I'm about to say, I'm breaking a taboo, like Fu Yuanhui (who swam in the 2016 Summer Olympics in Rio). In my journey through life I feel it's important to talk about this taboo… the taboo called weight.

I'm trying to loose weight. A lot of weight. It's built up over the course of about a year and a half due to unhealthy eating habits. I'm out of those people with a very slow metabolic rate. My body breaks food down slower than most so I gain weight quickly. Getting it off takes longer, a lot longer with a lot of hard work. It generally involves radical choices, in what I eat and how much I exercise. Both these two points have come under severe scrutiny and prejudice from people, who I'm assuming, feel guilty that I've realised something needs to change and I'm doing something to change it. They don't seem to like the fact that I'm doing something about my weight and they aren't.

People think that because they know me a little bit they can share with me what their thoughts are on a given topic, be it the dangers of running daily or putting skimmed milk in my breakfast, my tea and my coffee. This is something that greatly offends me as I already have trust issues* and don't appreciate people I don't really know telling me their point of view about something without asking if I'm open to it. I know this is going to cause shock waves through the web, but I like to think that honesty is one of the important aspects to life, even when it hurts.

As I write this I know there will be people who will likely go up in arms about what I've said. There are some people who tend to take offence for things that have nothing to do with them. I haven't even begun to understand why they feel they need to do this, especially over things that don't concern them; I'm just asking that if you're one of those people, please don't take offence over this post and contact me.

So as I bring this post to a close, I hope that you understand a little of where I'm going from... and a little of my mindset in the regard to my weight and trying to loose some of it.

*Over the last few years I've really been struggling with trusting people. Writing this is a big thing to post on such a public place. I'm more open to receiving advice or health tips from people I trust over those I'm not close to (and don't really trust yet). I've had a lot of bad things happen resulting from those I've trusted. I am working on this.

Journal

My Current Notebook For Journaling

The days are going by relatively swiftly and the packing is going well. I'm also sorting my things out as I need to decide what needs to come with me on my next adventure.

Over the last week I've spent time working on verious projects I've been working on over the last few months or years. One of these peojects is keeping a journal. I've been writing since I was eleven and it's gotten to the point where my writing keeps me sane. If there's something bothering me, I write it down or if I get a revelation about something, anything, I write it down. I've lived an extraordinary life. I mean, I've spent nineteen years of the last twenty three in countries where I don't hold citizenship to that country, where I need a visa to live there. I've had many adventures over the last twenty three years and I won't exchange that for anything. I was talking to one of my closest and oldest friends on FaceTime last night and we were both laughing so hard because of the things we got up to in our teenage years. Stories that were documented in notebooks that I called my journal. It's my legacy and if anything it's something to leave to future generations and if I live long enough in one place for longer than a year (in my heart I dream that one day I'll be able to settle down somewhere for longer than a few months) and I have access to all my journals, I'll use them as my primary source to write my biography. At the moment my journals are spread accross three countries (on two contents). I don't know what condition are my first few journals are in. I'm not totally sure where they are, in a shoebox in a container with the rest of my childhood things somewhere in Uganda. It does look like I won't be starting my biography for a few years as I won't be settling down, long for a while yet, due to very things (one day I will have my own place to call home).

News on my coming internship.

I heard yesterday that I have somewhere to stay for the duration of the internship, with a family (more to come when I've got more information). I'm also going to the UK for a week of training. I'm also looking forwards to that. It's going to be nice being back in the UK for longer than thirty six hours. More information to come over the next few weeks.

Throwback Post: Zebras

You Can See How Dry The Area Is

I said that I'd write about my time in South Africa as I didn't really post a lot whilst I was there. So here's the first post.

My parents live on a Wildlife Estate... which at the moment, is rather empty. There's a drought in the part of South Africa where my parents live, and quite a sever one. So a lot of the animals have been moved off the estate. Driving through the estate you really can see the emptiness, the dryness, the lack of animals and vegetation. When I lived in Hoedspruit I used to run regularly through the estate and I did so during my holiday, when we were here. I noticed, again, how empty the place is.

One story that I want to share is from one of my runs. The zebras in the Hoedspruit Wildlife Estate are generally very hard to see as they're shy creatures and usually hide deep in the bush so you don't see them. I was extremely fortunate to have one walk right past me. I saw a young one standing on the side of the road and I was able to get really close. The mother wasn't too pleased with me getting to close to her baby and gave me two warnings (she was hidden in the bush on the other side of the road). So I walked back and onto the side of the road. This gave the foal a chance to walk past me. The mother appeared a few minutes later and they continued on their way together.

Three Weeks To Go!!

The Heather's In Bloom!!

As you probably have guessed, I'm super exciting about the internship I'm going to be starting in The Hague Den Haag. I'm a city girl at heart and have really missed the bustle of a busy city. So moving to Den Haag is something I'm looking forwards to... however it's not just about being back in a city that I'm looking forwards to. I'm really looking forwards to doing this internship at Redeemer International Church. If the truth be told, I've never done an internship before and the church hasn't had an intern at the church doing this particular internship. So I'm really looking forwards to being involved with helping the church. Its a beautiful church and if you're ever in Den Haag on a Sunday morning you're more than welcome to drop in. The Sunday service starts at 10 o'clock at Niewe Kerk. The services are in English but translation is available if you ned it (to visit the church website, click here). I'll still be posting regularly on here throughout my internship at Redeemer. I must just point out that there are some things I've enjoyed about living in the countryside; like the forest and the heather fields. When I go running I usually go into the forest and through the heather fields. Though one thing I've learned is that Sunday is an extremely popular day to go for a bike ride through the heather fields. So I've been having to dodge bikers and dog walkers. Now that I've got some time to pack I'll still be finding time to run when people are generally at work (as this will mean that the bike paths will be quiet).

Carl, Lianne, me, Maartje and Bas

Yesterday we had the final meeting for the GOTeams 2016 season, which also brings means that my time with the department has come to an end (I've still got a few weeks at Herdershof to pack for Den Haag). We finished cleaning up after the debrief, there was some stuff that needed putting away and two bungalows needed a quick clean, there was also some things that needed sorting out before we left for an early dinner. There was five of us who went to this posh restaurant in Epe. Bas and his wife, Maartje; Carl, Lianne and myself. It was a lot of fun as we spent the time letting off some post GOTeams steam. I think we were one of the more rowdy tables there (thankfully we weren't too rowdy that we were asked to leave). I'm going to miss working with the guys. They've been a lot of fun to work with... and have showed me a lot about how things work when it comes to working with young people and preparing outreaches for the teams. From what I heard they all had an epic time away and have many stories (I heard a few stories of how God looked after the different teams) to tell their families. I can't help but wonder how many will end up doing Discipleship Training School DTSs at some point... or will go into missions with other organisations.

Anyway, I've got some things to do today. Until next time.

It's Over!!

The dish washing bowls

If you look at the time stamp... you'll see that its almost midnight. I'm not sure what I'm feeling about the fact that The GOTeams Outreaches of 2016 are over and done for another year. Its hard to believe that more than nine months of work have been put into three weeks worth of outreach... and now its done. Everyone's gone home to their own beds, with loads of exiting stories of adventures they had when on outreach (and dirty washing).

We're all ready for some rest (even though I've just been away; in my case, it'll be packing to leave). Many of the participants are in school (be it high school or university) and start again in less than two weeks time. So they're all looking forwards to rest and process what God has done through them. They were able to reach out in the countries they went to and were a great blessing wherever they went. Three of the four teams that we put together arrived on Monday night, many after traveling long stints. One thing we do is debrief each team, so we encourage them to share their experiences of how they think the outreach went. It gives them a chance to sort things out that need sorting out. Most of these talks were done in under two hours. Then the Brazil team arrived late last night and were debriefed after lunch today. We made sure that all the teams had the chance to rest during the mornings.

This evening we closed off the entire outreach with a report back service. We had over a hundred people (including the teams) present and were able to hear their stories. I didn't hear everything (thus the reason why there's no stories present) as I'd made tea and coffee beforehand and needed to clear up. From what I heard was that God had really used them. People had been saved, children had been loved, healing had taken place and above all, the participants had taken a deeper revelation of God's love for them. They've all gone home with a new revelation of God's heart and for me, that's really important.

The next few weeks are going to be interesting. As an office/department we're going to do a quick check of the base and then go out for a meal. Then I'll start packing for my move to Den Haag. That starts in three weeks time and I'm really looking forwards to this move. I'm not sure what the future holds but I'm expecting some great things to happen.

Looking Back; Looking Forwards

My parents in Silhouette at Lisbon Falls, near Graskop South Africa
I'm so Grateful They Still Love Each Other and God

News
I can't believe how quickly my holiday in South Africa went by. I'm in my office again, here at Heidebeek. Its been exciting what God did in me whilst I was down there with my parents. He's started preparing me for my move to The Hague Den Haag. Its going to be the first time I'm going to be working outside of Youth With A Mission YWAM, without planning to join another base, since I did my Discipleship Training School back in 2012. I'm really excited about moving back to a city but at the same time I'm shaking inside. Moving to Den Haag is moving out of my comfort zone. I've gotten comfortable being in YWAM because I know how everything works; I know what's expected of me. So moving to a new city to do something completely new is scary. Yet at the same time, God is in control. He didn't ask me to serve Him where I feel comfortable, but has asked me to be willing to step out of my comfort zone and into whatever He has planned for me. He holds my future in His hands and I feel that moving to Den Haag is the start of something good.

This zebra colt walked right past me

Revelation

One thing that God has really impressed upon me over the last few weeks is that I've been called to be radical. Radical in everything. Not just my faith and what I do, but being willing to go against the grain with my entire life. I've also been on a journey of accepting myself the way God made me. Its why I've started growing my hair out and have been wearing makeup more. Its why I've been exercising more regularly and eating healthy again (no high fat, sugary foods or carbohydrates like potatoes, rice, spaghetti, etc). I'm feeling more comfortable in my skin but have a long way still to go.

Traveling Grace

Thankfully God made sure I got back to Herdershof alright. My flight from Johannesburg was on time, so I didn't miss my flight to Amsterdam. My suitcase made it through as well and was waiting for me on the conveyer belt. It did take longer getting out of Schipol than it should have done. I almost left one of my pieces of hand luggage on my plane from London but thankfully I noticed almost as soon as I was off the place. I had to walk to the other side of the airport in search of a flight of stairs going down to immigration and baggage reclaim as a number of the stairs were out of service (or something, you never know with airports). Once I was through customs, I had to walk all the way back (on the arrivals hall) to find the conveyer belt that had the luggage from my flight. Thankfully I didn't have to wait long for my suitcase. I then caught a train to Zwolle and got a taxi home. I spent the last few days resting after my 26+ hour journey from Hoedspruit. I'm still a bit tired but God is in control and is looking after me. He's always looking after me. He's a good God who love me so much! He's spent the last two weeks showing me how deeply He cares! He's given me wise parents who love me unconditionally (even when I've messed up).

Until next time, dear reader.

Preparing To Travel... Again

I'm sitting on my bed. Its my last night in South Africa and I can't help but stare at my suitcase again. Its packed and ready to be loaded into the car tomorrow morning. I'm boarding the bus to Johannesburg Airport tomorrow morning and I'm don't feel ready to leave, partly because I'll be traveling for about twenty four hours. I love traveling but I wish my time here was longer. The last two weeks have flown by so fast. I wish I had longer in South Africa with my parents... the last two weeks have been amazing. I've spent a lot of time with my parents, traveling to various places. Thankfully we've been blessed with a car that my parents were lent my some Dutch friends of theirs who currently live in the Netherlands but have a home in South Africa and come once or twice a year for a few months.

On Monday we travelled to Hazyview, a little town a few hours drive away from Hoedspruit. My mum had organised a sky trail trip. For those of you who don't know what this is, its like a zip line. You're in a harness, which is attached to a special clip with wheel, this is then attached onto the wire. So you travel down the mountain on a wire... a bit like a cablecar, but without the cablecar. Its an awful lot of fun, once you get over the terror of being traveling a good 20 odd metres above the ground and being held there by nothing more than a harness and a safety clip with wheels. Yes, we did wear helmets, as you can see and we wore gloves so that we wouldn't burn our hands, when we'd slow down (we had to grab the wire and squeeze it with our strong hand to slow ourselves down... being slowed down too much was bad). I should mention that only one person would travel between one platform and the next, with trained guides at each end.

We then spent Monday and Tuesday in a beautiful little wood cabin near Graskop (which is another 40 minutes or so from Hazyview). We spent some time exploring the beauty of the surrounding area and seeing some sights. We got home yesterday and spent today doing last minute errands. Yesterday was voting day here in South Africa and thus a public holiday. So the things that we'd planned to do yesterday were shifted through to today. It was busy, but it's been good.